My Dearest Younger Self,
Because I know you hate reading long lengthy messages and letters I’ll piece out the main topics you’ll want to know about:
Career & School
Right now, you’re most likely planning out the next five years of your life, scribbling in an agenda, or strategizing how and when to apply to medical school. Heads up, you apply to medical school and get denied. Sorry babe. Just know you will be low-key happy regarding the denials.
I know right now you absolutely dread working in the pharmacy but you wait and see how much that experience helps you catapult your career! You’ll work in places you love and climb the ladder pretty fast. You get your Masters and start your own business! I won’t kill the element of surprise by telling you where you work and what you get your Masters in. You think about applying to medical school again but you don’t want to go for a number of reasons. I’m telling you this so you enjoy your life because there is no use in worrying. You plan a lot and 90% of your plans actually come to fruition so chill out a bit. There are a few deviations but you handle them flawlessly. I want this to serve as peace of mind. Don’t stress yourself out or panic about the future, your future self is pretty badass if I say so myself.
You likely saw this section and rolled your eyes. I know you are super closed off right now and keep everyone and every emotion at arm’s length. You’re seriously a master compartmentalizer. Always have been and you still are but in a much healthier way. You’re so afraid to love anyone or let people close to you love you and you figure out why after a few years of therapy. Yup, therapy. You tell people who inquire that you indeed see a therapist and could give two sh*ts about their opinion. Yeah…you still keep that part of you: not caring about what people think.
Anyway, back to talking about love. You fall in love. I know, I know…I’m still surprised and I already lived through the experience. You fall really hard my love and then…you get your heart broken. I know the logical part of you right now is saying, “this is exactly why you don’t love people” but the future you responds to heartbreak so much differently. You literally tell people, “it’s better to have had my heart broken and loved than to not have loved at all”. I know you’re gagging reading this but the love you experienced changed you for the better. Just wait, you’ll see. You literally love yourself more than you ever have. I know, how is that possible but believe me when I tell you it is! The relationship you have with yourself is the greatest love you’ll ever experience.
You practice gratitude now more than ever. I know where you are right now you seriously struggle with it. You accomplish something and see it as nothing more than a checkbox. That is no way to live life. You look in the lane of others and compare. You eventually grow out of this and realize how extremely fortunate and blessed you are. I hope by reading this you start to practice it even sooner. It would take away so much of your anxiety. Regardless, you’ll be proud of the woman you become. I mean WE really did the work. You are different. You see life differently and your priorities shift for the better. You are a kinder soul and I am so happy to tell you all that anger you are harboring within you dissipates. You were angry for so many years, through adolescence and your current stage in life but as you reach this future stage in life you haven’t a thing to be angry about.
I could tell you all the things to do differently or what to avoid but I honestly just want you to know where you are in life right now is right where you need to be.
I love you,
Your Future Wiser & Self-Actualized Self